Fuzzy Wuzzy?

Oh yes, I feel a bit fuzzy on and off all day every day. Thinking is sketchy; typing is sketchy; memory is sketchier than usual. It's funny some of the things I don't remember except for the ones I forgot. How's that for sketchy?

The soreness from slicing between my ribs is slowly going away - only hurts when I breathe, harder/harder kind of thing. Lung volume is what I most can work on. Before I was riding my bicycle 20 - 40 miles per week. Now walking across the room is a small workout. So, I am one of those guys pulling an air canister with tubing to my nose. I always thought those were oxygen filled and people smoking near them were risking all our lives. Nope. Just filtered & compressed air. The coordination test of gracefully dancing through the tangles of tubing throughout the house is good exercise. And fun to watch the uninitiated be caught in the web.

Made a foray out into the world (2nd time post hospital?) with my Mom this day before she leaves. Went to IHOP. Amazing what an enjoyable adventure little things can be. Like my 76 yr old Mom from Kansas negotiating our traffic in a car she has never driven before. I closed my eyes alot and as I learned from Jacki, thought of all the heads my mother's driving has not decapitated recently. IHOP pancakes are still among the best, and the server spilled no coffee.

Eight of my guys brought a meeting to me last night. Filled 'em in on "the facts Ma'am, just the facts". I shared first about how I now feel the pain of responding poorly to people in my past when they were suffering loss or major health problems or whatever. I have mostly given them short shrift, saying something like,"Sorry you are going throught that", and then not even rembering their situation or reaching out in anyway. I see now that I did not know what to say or do and so I distanced myself. Some of those I have to now say "I was wrong . . ." because I harmed them. Being on the other side now, I know I like people calling even to just leave a message. Or a little text, with no reply required. Receiving the message is great; having to call back may put more on a full plate. Fine line to walk, huh?

It is great to say "Anything I can do?" if you mean it, but you just might be asked. Asking for help is tough. As we shared around the group, it was near unanimous that receiving help is tough as askng for help. The thing is, if I cannot allow myself to receive your help, then you are not allowed to give your help, so noone gets closer to the other human being by being just that - human.

One of those guys last night laid out the best thing we all can do for those in pain or sick or dying or just plain bummed out. Just go ahead and say the niceties, but then ................ just listen. Amazing the wisdom and compassion born of experience.
Bill